ACCOMPAGNEMENTS FORMATIFS POUR LES ÉQUIPES DU SECTEUR PUBLIC
Cost Per Notch Redux
What Every Girl Should Know
What Every Girl Should Know
Setting Boundaries With Your Partner
Managing Stress at the End of a Relationship
Valentine’s Day: A Date Which Will Live In Infamy
The Importance of Trust in a Family
Let Go of Your Past to Heat Up Your Present Relationship
The Hottest Kiss in the History of Earth
It’s a Fling Thing
Looking for Love This Summer?
I view the SMP as requiring default model risk management because it didn’t matter to me, as it doesn’t to most men, that only 20%, 30% or 40% are wiped out by love. When you’re wiped out, you’re wiped out. This is the current system; this is why 30% of men under 40 have opted out of the marriage game (cf. Pew survey); this is reality, whether or not we wish it to be so. Stare at the facts, not the mirror of your desires. Experience has a way of laughing at your intentions, in those intentions are naive. Women know they have the cards, the law, and the culture. We tend to have the obsolete ambitions of home, hearth, and legacy driving us. We must throttle our impulses to project our obsolete designs on a fair vixen, assertively chosen or otherwise.
I submit that here that Jeremy is providing advice on a probability-weighted problem (“in the main this may well work”), when in fact, for some of us, we are dealing with a HA-HA, YOU ARE SO DEAD problem. Normally, and it appears that Jeremy’s advice reflects this error, men like Ton and I are written off as “bitter losers” or some such. In fact we are providing deep insight:
If you marry badly, and by this I mean if your spouse changes her mind, before likely changing it again, YOU ARE SO DEAD. You are not disadvantaged. You are not inconvenienced. You are not in recovery. You are SO DEAD.
How, exactly? You will be rebuilding your balance sheet in middle age. You will never, never, enjoy the comforts of home (it has been taken from you), children (they have been taken from you, and your position reduced to that of favored uncle in the best case), and love (you loved, and you lost, and unless you are a moron, you will never love similarly again). The conventional gloss on this situation — “shut up and choose better next time, stop whining, only bitter losers talk this way, I don’t know anyone who treats men this way” — the conventional gloss is a see-no-evil prayer. It’s a prayer that this never happens “me”, whoever is “me” is. But it does, and it will — maybe 20-40% of the time. If you like those odds, you are arithmetically illiterate.
What Every Girl Should Know
What Every Girl Should Know
Setting Boundaries With Your Partner
Managing Stress at the End of a Relationship
Valentine’s Day: A Date Which Will Live In Infamy
The Importance of Trust in a Family
Let Go of Your Past to Heat Up Your Present Relationship
The Hottest Kiss in the History of Earth
It’s a Fling Thing
Looking for Love This Summer?
I view the SMP as requiring default model risk management because it didn’t matter to me, as it doesn’t to most men, that only 20%, 30% or 40% are wiped out by love. When you’re wiped out, you’re wiped out. This is the current system; this is why 30% of men under 40 have opted out of the marriage game (cf. Pew survey); this is reality, whether or not we wish it to be so. Stare at the facts, not the mirror of your desires. Experience has a way of laughing at your intentions, in those intentions are naive. Women know they have the cards, the law, and the culture. We tend to have the obsolete ambitions of home, hearth, and legacy driving us. We must throttle our impulses to project our obsolete designs on a fair vixen, assertively chosen or otherwise.
I submit that here that Jeremy is providing advice on a probability-weighted problem (“in the main this may well work”), when in fact, for some of us, we are dealing with a HA-HA, YOU ARE SO DEAD problem. Normally, and it appears that Jeremy’s advice reflects this error, men like Ton and I are written off as “bitter losers” or some such. In fact we are providing deep insight:
If you marry badly, and by this I mean if your spouse changes her mind, before likely changing it again, YOU ARE SO DEAD. You are not disadvantaged. You are not inconvenienced. You are not in recovery. You are SO DEAD.
How, exactly? You will be rebuilding your balance sheet in middle age. You will never, never, enjoy the comforts of home (it has been taken from you), children (they have been taken from you, and your position reduced to that of favored uncle in the best case), and love (you loved, and you lost, and unless you are a moron, you will never love similarly again). The conventional gloss on this situation — “shut up and choose better next time, stop whining, only bitter losers talk this way, I don’t know anyone who treats men this way” — the conventional gloss is a see-no-evil prayer. It’s a prayer that this never happens “me”, whoever is “me” is. But it does, and it will — maybe 20-40% of the time. If you like those odds, you are arithmetically illiterate.